Skip to main content

The Hga pt.5


OK. So-most of what I thought I knew of the HGA was completely wrong. Not entirely, but my understanding only went so far. Tonight, on the full moon, I prayed my heart out. Then, I turned my gaze inward....and click. Something Happened....haha. A wonderful awareness.  A beauty, a state of awareness, an understanding. To be absolutely frank, Peregrin's understanding of this was more true, more insightful than my own.  The forms I perceived and communed with were a necessary step for me, but they weren't complete in nature.... because they had forms at all. I was still looking Outward-instead of experiencing inward. Those forms-the perception of them-are a layer of separation... This is not coming out right, but I don't have the words. I want to live my entire life with the understanding I had for those 10 or so minutes. This was an amazing evening-I wish I could describe it in a way that makes sense.

Comments

  1. Rufus OpusDecember 4, 2009 at 10:20 AM

    Congrats! You made it through the hard part. Welcome to the club.

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownDecember 4, 2009 at 1:26 PM

    Thanks RO! I see now why nobody writes about this clearly. You can't, really. Has to be experienced; words aren't enough...at least, not the one's I can pull up. =)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Working brujeria for others is often thankless and time consuming.

Sala Malongo, Man, y'all. I find that I now spend the vaaaaast majority of my sorcerous/meditative time doing work for others. Which is awesome in many ways, as I've gotten very skilled at what I do. I've got no time for the experimentation, though. No time just fooling about. Sometimes I'm tempted to just say fuck it, and return to just doing things for myself....but I'm a priest, a Tata Nkisi. So I have duties beyond entertainment, and beyond my own development. Gotta balance this stage in the life as well. It's interesting, at the very least. I would have been overjoyed when I was a young aspiring wizard in my 20's to have this kind of problem, haha. Now I look back wistfully at the days when I could meditate for 4 hours straight--or at all-without scheduling a meeting with myself on Google Calendar. Many of the folks who are clients become good friends, some become students, others end up becoming sorcerer/priests themselves. And they are a bless...
1 comment
Read more

Bullshit Siddhis

Nsala malongo, So.....powers. They exist. You work your alchemy, and they start popping up. It isn't what you expect. It's not like the comics. Subtle things happen. You get a little something here, a big something there. Some of them appear useless at first. Some years ago, after work in the upper cinnabar field, I gained the dubiously awesome ability to see a sort of spirit double floating around people. At first I was BEYOND stoked, and thought I was well on my way toward ascension from my normal state into a vicious and powerful spiritual overlord, as was foretold. By me. When I was like, fourteen. Then, after the wonder wore off, I realized that this was absolutely useless. The double gave me no information about the person, no power to manipulate myself or the other. It was just there. So. Countless hours of heat and concentration, and the end result was this? Of course it *was* useful in the long-run, as a mark of my developing spiritual s...
4 comments
Read more

Animal sacrifice and the power of Life and Death

Nsala Malongo, Death and ritual sacrifice are very large components of my magical and religious practice, and I find that very seldom are they explored with any deep understanding of why they are useful and necessary for certain rites and practices. There is definitely a repugnance for the sacrifice for animals in the frankly White-er side of Western magical and religious practice. I've heard a number of persons rail against it as cruel and entirely unnecessary, that it is uncivilized and barbaric. Obviously I think these persons aren't examining their views deeply; rarely are these individuals persons who abstain from eating animals...they just don't get their hands "dirty". I never hear them complaining about how Jewish folk practice kosher religious slaughter, or even much about the Halal practices of some Muslim folks. Read a newspaper in any city with neighborhoods that have a  decent amount of ATR practicing folks and you'd think the death of a chicken...
14 comments
Read more